Four ways to focus on the new you before New Years
The Fresh Start Women’s Foundation (FSW) of Phoenix wanted to give women an edge in their quest to find new careers. They wanted to go beyond job placement and help women get fulfillment from their work. They partnered with Goodwill of Central Arizona to create a program that empowered women to take control of their job searches. Goodwill helps in job placement, and FSW helps in personal development. The end result is goal-centric women ready to work hard and build a better future.
Becoming the master of your own circumstances takes focus. It also takes clarity and a bit of stoicism to recognize what you want to change about your life. Discipline will give you the follow-through. You need to focus on changing the parts of your life that cause you the most pain, and work towards changing those. Once you have embraced success, you must make failure not only impossible but unbearable. Motivate yourself by seeing the potential in what you do.
Focus on the biggest issue
When you stop and think about it, there are issues competing for our attention all day long. Will my marriage or my relationship work out? What about my job? What if I don’t save enough for retirement? All of these are valid questions, but they are goals you need to work out one at a time.
When your objective becomes losing weight, don’t shift your attention to your salary. Find the biggest source of misery in your life and eliminate it. If that’s your job, change it. I’m not saying quit your job, I’m saying work toward doing what you want to do. Starting with smaller trails like Hyrogliphics Canyon off 60 E, a roughly 3 mile hike up a gradual slope, you can work your way up to a half day hike. Havasupai in the South Rim of the Grand Canyon is a 20 mile hike that takes about six hours to complete, but by the end you’ll have seen a series of waterfalls and colors you’ll never forget and conquered a few mountains along the way.
Self-control is not what you think it is
When we think about curbing our vices, we tell ourselves to exercise some self-control. This is a false notion. What is self control if we are not even aware of what most of our brain is doing? Think about it. When you can tell me why we dream, or what déjà vu is all about then we’ll talk about self-control. Until then, you have to re-cognize your boundaries. One way to start is by building habits that are consistent and easy to do. Maybe you get up in the morning and immediately jump in the shower, maybe you go for a walk outside, whatever it is do something small and easy to repeat.
Self control is also a form of mental fortitude, and we use it every time wander places like the Paradise Valley mall and resist indulging in a spend-a-thon. But it’s proactive, and it can help us do great things if we put it to work.
It’s this mental fortitude that motivates and keep us grounded before we even leave the house
Make failure impossible
What if you moved to China and you couldn’t order food? How would you survive? That part of you that says you don’t know, but believes you just will, is the part of you that makes failure impossible. Figure out how to work on the smaller goals in your life as you reach toward your larger strides. Want to get paid more, and build websites? Freelance as a coder or slice websites. Want to lose weight? Eat smaller portions and spend less on food. Figure out a system to ration out your money, but plan for rewards to lessen the blow.
Don’t neglect your life either. Failure extends to your marriage and you should treat your wife with the respect she deserves. Send her fresh flowers just because, or come home and cook dinner instead of waiting for her to do so. Those small gestures tell her you care and get her excited to see what you can do in the kitchen.
Make failure painful
Maneesh Sethi supposedly hired a woman to slap him when he wasn’t working. You don’t need to go to that extreme, but the lesson is that failure has to be something that you feel. It helps motivate you when you know what’s at stake. A lack of focus is bad for business, and it’s bad for you. Don’t get lost in depression and aimlessness; create real consequences for your failure in order to keep yourself motivated.