The Westside Gazette

The Republican clown car on the move

Running Down the Ridiculous

The Republican clown car on the move

By Wilson Nathaniel Thomas

 

    It is just beyond amazing to me as to just how many ignorant, extreme, selfish, and Neanderthal mentality having ignoramuses the Republican party can fit into that RIDICULOUS little clown car that they have been driving across the nation in. Frankly, until the Tea Baggers infiltrated and then subsequently took over the Republican Party, nobody in America actually knew that there were so many ways to show the world just how ignorant, and just ass backwards a major political party could be.

    Now normally it would be far beyond me to ever send out a general message of thanks to the Republicans, but I feel that in light of recent revelations, and almost the daily occurrence of some misguided, ill thinking Republican fool placing his own foot in his own mouth, I am now compelled to raise my wine glass full of white grape juice with a smile and say, “Thank you Republicans for being the hateful, bigoted, knuckle dragging, ignorant jackasses that you keep proving yourselves to be over and over again.”

    Missouri Congressman Todd Akin got himself into a whole lot of trouble for actually speaking what he actually believed this week. You see Akin actually had the nerve to say that women do not get pregnant as a result of being raped, and that victims of rape have some sort of an innate ability to be able to shut their bodies down to prevent pregnancy.

    Now for those of you folks out there who barely watch the news, and who would rather walk backwards through the fires of hell with gasoline underwear on than read anything, let me implore you to read what is written here, and read it carefully, because I would hate for your disdain for any and all things literal to be the cause of you willfully allowing yourselves to be the tools of the Republican party, as it is a party that preys on the chosen ignorance of others.

    Akin blissfully asserted on a Sunday morning talk show that legitimate rapes did not result in pregnancy, because the female body had the ability to shut that sort of thing down. He even went so far as to reference some medical professionals that have done some research on this to back up his RIDICULOUS assertion, however, surprise, surprise, he failed to mention who the physicians were who had done this research. In other words, Akin followed the typical Republican mantra; he uttered frightening, RIDICULOUS and repugnant language dripping with bigotry and hatred from his lips, yet offered absolutely no proof in the ways of fact or evidence to back him up. Jesus, I would think that Republicans would be totally exhausted by now, because it seems to me that lying about everything takes a whole lot of energy. The American Medical Association was quick to come out with a statement denouncing Akins’ claims.

    Now for those of you, who think that this is much to do about nothing, let me make myself very clear, Akin is not just some back woods, fly by the seat of his pants politician, who is con-fused, misguided, and going rouge. This is a man that truly believes in every filthy, disgusting and despicable thought that he has ever uttered about women. This is a man who apparently hates women. And he is not the only one sitting up there in Congress collecting $174,000 a year in tax payer dollars that feels that way.

    Members of the Republican party have been trampling all over themselves trying to distance themselves from Akin and his legitimate  rape comments, but really they can’t because their new vice presidential running mate co-sponsored several bills with Akin, all of which attack women and limit their rights. The powers that be within the Republican party may try to distance themselves by cutting off funding to this idiot’s campaign, but just as the Vandellas have been singing for years, they have “Nowhere to Run and Nowhere to hide’”

    If you have a vagina, you had better beware, because this man and his buddies are gunning for you. Somehow this creature of circumstance and others like him forgot that they had to pass through some poor woman’s vagina. Seriously, what a shame that the women that actually gave birth to these creatures chose to forgo secreting those secret juices that women are now being told that they have to “Shut down” pregnancy on the nights that they were conceived.

    As always if you have questions or comments about anything that you read in the Rundown, please send them to runningdowntheridiculous@gmail.com.

 

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