(Now the Full Satire Alert): In a move sending shockwaves through the Republican party, a top‑secret document recovered from a White House shredder reveals plans to rename the GOP the Trumpublican Party any day now. Plans call for a name‑change celebration on Hallowe’en, timed so the president can hand out gold‑foil chocolate coins bearing his profile to trick‑or-treaters on the South Lawn.