Tyler Perry on His Childhood: “It Was a Living Hell”

 By Gemma Greene

(Source BlackDoctor.org.)

      Many see the funny jokes, the Hollywood parties, the fame, and the box office dollars from actor, director, writer, and producer Tyler Perry, but many don’t know the full story of what he endured to get here.

There are a number of blogs saying he lived out of his car for years until he was able to start being successful in plays, but what about before that?

For years, Tyler says he suffered brutal physical abuse at the hands of his father and severe sexual abuse at the hands of several adults growing up. Inside or outside the home, Tyler says he never felt safe.

As a little boy who was molested by three different men and one woman before the age of 10—before he even knew what sex was–it was something like out of a twisted, sick horror movie.

In his recent 2023 Amazon documentary, “Tyler Perry: Maxine’s Baby” and in an in-depth interview with Oprah in 2010, Tyler revealed the gory details of his traumatic childhood and shared his personal story—a story of strength, power and, ultimately, triumph.

Oprah says she never realized how brutal Tyler’s childhood really was. When she asks Tyler to describe the early years, his answer says it all. “[It was] a living hell,” Tyler explains.

  As a picture of a young Tyler flashes across the screen, he starts to tear up and tears start flowing. “That’s hard for me to look at,” he says. “I feel like I died as a child.”

To endure the violent beatings, shouting and name-calling, Tyler says he used his imagination to escape.

“I could go to this park [in my mind] that my mother and my aunt had taken me to. I’m there in this park running and playing, and it was such a good day,” he says. “So, every time somebody was doing something to me that was horrible, that was awful, I could go to this park in my mind until it was over.”

One particular beating Tyler says he’ll never forget is the time his father brutally whipped him with a vacuum cord.

“To this day, I don’t know why he did it. But I remember him cornering me in a room and hitting me with this vacuum cleaner cord. He would just not stop. There are all these welts on [me], the flesh that’s coming from my bone, and I had to wait for him to go to sleep,” Tyler says. “When he fell asleep, I ran to my aunt’s house, and she was mortified when she saw it.

After another vicious beating from his father, Tyler says he Blacked out for three days. “He played these mind games with me,” Tyler says. “This one in particular, he wanted me to change a tire.” As Tyler worked to loosen the bolts, he says his father screamed and cursed at him. Even Tyler’s mother and uncle tried to help him…but they couldn’t prevent the inevitable.

“[My father] couldn’t get the bolts off [either] because they were rusted,” Tyler says. “He looked up at me, and there was a smirk on my face. All I remember is him tackling me, and I remember holding onto a chain-link fence so tight, my hands are bloody and he’s hitting me.”

Every day, Tyler says he lived in fear that something, even the smallest little thing, would set his father off. It got so bad, young Tyler took drastic measures. One day, he says he slit his wrists and tried to commit suicide.

“I thought, ‘What is the point of living?’” he says. “My mother was truly my saving grace because she would take me to church with her. I would see my mother smiling in the choir, and I wanted to know this God that made her so happy. If I had not had that faith in my life, I don’t know where I would be right now.”

In addition to the brutal physical abuse, Tyler says he also suffered severe sexual abuse at the hands of four different adults.

Tyler says he was five or six years old the first time he was molested. While building a birdhouse with an adult male neighbor, the man put his hands in Tyler’s pants, he says. “I’m thinking, ‘What is this?’” Tyler says. “And I felt my body betraying me because I felt an erection at that age.”

Tyler says he later endured sexual molestation at the hands of a male nurse and a man he knew from church. “[The man from church] used God and the Bible against me to justify a lot of the things that were going on. It was so horrible,” Tyler says. “And that was my first sexual experience, with this man performing oral sex on me as a boy.”

When Tyler was just 10 years old, he says he was also molested by a friend’s mother. Tyler says he was over at his friend’s house while the mother was arguing with her boyfriend in another room. Then, she suddenly appeared in… …front of him, wearing lingerie.

Tyler says she put her son in the bathroom to take a bath and told Tyler to go home. But, when he tried to open the door, it was locked.

“I hear the click, click, click of the door. I couldn’t unlock it. She lays on the sofa. I didn’t know she was wearing lingerie at the time. I said, ‘I have to go. It’s getting dark.’”

   “I’m 10. And she says, ‘You want to go home?’ She lights a cigarette. She takes the key. She said, ‘Here’s the key.’ I come over to get it, and she puts it inside of herself and she tells me to get it. So—I get the key, but I feel my body betraying me again because I felt an erection.” He continues the disgusting details.

“She pulled me on top of her. So, my first sexual experience was with a woman, which was it,” Tyler admitted.

Tyler’s mother passed away on December 8, 2009. “She suffered so much horror in her life—surviving breast cancer, the abuse from my father, the belittling, the beatings.

And I just could not be a source of pain,” he says. “I knew if I spoke about this, that she would be hurt. So, I didn’t. Now, I feel this tremendous sense of, Now it’s time for me to take care of me and get some of this stuff out of me and be free from it.”

Tyler says he will not have a relationship with his father who is still alive. Even though he says he forgave him, he will not put himself through the fear and emotions that surface whenever he’s around.

When asked why he forgave him after all that was done to him.

Tyler simply said, “I had to. For me.”

“I think that’s really important to be clear that just because you forgive somebody does not mean that you now want to be around them,” Oprah says.