Thank You – A Handwritten Letter Is No Longer The Most Popular Way To Express Gratitude



By Simona Kitanovska

The traditional handwritten ‘thank you’ letter is no longer the most popular way to express gratitude – with digital methods such as instant messages and emails favored instead, according to research.


A poll of 2,000 adults found just nine percent send a letter of thanks nowadays – a drop of 11 percent compared to 10 years ago.

While messages via WhatsApp, SMS text, email and Facebook, have become some of the most common ways to show appreciation.

Despite this, handwritten notes of gratitude are in fact considered to be among the most meaningful ways to say thank you – close behind heartfelt phone calls and visiting someone to show appreciation in-person.

Further highlighting the significance of the personal touch, the M&S Club Rewards research found hand-delivering flowers or treating someone to a coffee were also among the most genuine ways to show thanks.

The research also found 58 percent think it is more important than ever to say thank you to loved ones, with 28 percent admitting the last couple of years have helped them appreciate the little things.

And 29 percent think it’s important to show others just how much they mean to them – so they realize how loved they are.

However, three in 10 don’t tend to say thank you in a meaningful way as often as they would like.

Etiquette expert, William Hanson, said: “Gratitude will never fall out of fashion and while how we say thank you may have changed, simple good manners are timeless and priceless, and saying thank you has never been easier.

Brian Toro writes a card to be placed into a folder at the Military Post Office established at Longstreth Elementary School for military members involved in the U.S.-led war with Iraq April 2, 2003 in Warminster, Pennsylvania. (Photo by William Thomas Cain/Getty Images)

“However, in our digital age – and with all these new and simple ways to communicate and show our gratitude – saying a quick thank you via instant message has become the default for many.

“But if you really want to share a meaningful thank you, giving someone your time or adding an element of a personal or more human touch will go a long way and have a much bigger impact.”

The study also found the average adult says thank you to loved ones seven times a week – with one in 10 expressing their gratitude 21 times or more.

Seven in 10 also feel a meaningful ‘thank you’ can be very powerful – with those polled feeling appreciated’ (46 percent), ‘happy’ (38 percent), and ‘positive’ (31 percent) following one.

More than a third (35 percent) have also used loyalty points earned through reward schemes to share treats with others – as a way of thanking them.

Almost four in 10 (38 percent) do this because they like having small treats to look forward to throughout the year which they can enjoy with friends and family.

And 43 percent like to thank others in this way because it makes both loved ones and themselves feel good.

Paul Stokes, from M&S Club Rewards, said: “Our research shows that while the art of saying thank you may have evolved over the years, the importance of showing our gratitude has never been higher.

“Over the last few years, we have had to come together and support each other perhaps more than ever, so it’s great to see that, as a nation, so many of us are taking the time to share a thank you.

“While some of the more traditional ways to of saying thank you are still around today, our research found that people are showing their thanks in many different ways.

“Using loyalty points and rewards vouchers earnt throughout the year is a great way to show your gratitude and treat others.”

Girls hug each other during Sydney Racing at Royal Randwick Racecourse on November 02, 2021 in Sydney, Australia. (Photo by Mark Evans/Getty Images)

Top twenty most popular ways to say thank you:

1. A phone call
2. WhatsApp message
3. SMS text message
4. Email
5. Facebook message
6. A hug
7. A visit to somebody’s home to say thank you in person
8. Handwritten letter
9. Hand delivering flowers
10. A small gift
11. Arranging for flowers to be delivered
12. With chocolates
13. Treating someone to a coffee
14. Taking someone out for a meal
15. A FaceTime call
16. Offering someone help in the future/offer of support
17. With cake
18. E-card
19. Instagram message
20. Video message

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